


Myxie's APDN Pink Eye Entries

by PrincessMyxomatosis



Category: South Park
Genre: Blood, Death, Drug Use, F/F, F/M, Ghosts, Halloween, Haunted Houses, Haunting, Hell, Injury, Jack-o'-lanterns, M/M, Multi, Organs, Other, Spiders, Witch - Freeform, mummy - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:48:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26811646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrincessMyxomatosis/pseuds/PrincessMyxomatosis
Summary: The Ample Parking Day or Night Discord Gaming Server's Pink Eye Mini Event Submissions1- Jack-O-Lantern2- Ghost3- Witch4- Frankenstein's Monster5- Mummy6- Zombie7- Spider8- Vampire9- Organs/Blood10- Skeleton11- Aliens/Visitors12- Scarecrow13- Crow14- Owl15- Candy16- Cemetary17- Black Cat18- Demon/Devil19- Eyeballs20- Hay ride21- Moon22- Princess23- Shadow24- Doll25- Wolf/Werewolf26- Potion27- Cauldron28- Poltergeist29- Mask30- Trick or Treat31- THE BIG DAY - HALLOWEEN
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak, Eric Cartman/Kyle Broflovski/Leopold "Butters" Stotch, Eric Cartman/Leopold "Butters" Stotch, Gerald Broflovski/Stuart McCormick, Henrietta Biggle/Kenny McCormick/Leopold "Butters" Stotch, Kyle Broflovski/Stan Marsh, Philip "Pip" Pirrip/Damien Thorn, Randy Marsh/Towelie
Comments: 1
Kudos: 21





	1. Jack-o-Lantern

It just sits there, smiling its evil grin at me...

I stand, waiting for my boyfriend to finish getting ready. 

We're supposed to go trick-or-treating together, but he claims he doesn't want me to see his costume before it's complete. 

I slide down to sit on the steps, waiting ever-impatiently for him to finish.

It just sits there...watching me...waiting for me to look away; the flame flickers inside, cooking the rotten flesh of the 20-day old Jack-o-Lantern.

On occasion, I swear I could've seen the mouth move slightly. I try not to smear the makeup on my face as I rub one eye, keeping the other on the pumpkin.

This time, I _know _I saw it. The eyes---they've moved.__

__It's now staring directly at me. I freeze. "He'll never believe me..." I think to myself, now rubbing the other eye._ _

__"Wh-What do you want from me, Mr. Jack-o-Lantern??" I ask, shivering at the chill in the air._ _

__"I could use a new candle." He replied, opening his mouth wide as the flame inside flickers out._ _

__"I'll grab one from Craig's mom," I state, looking to the ground as I stand to my feet. "Y-You're... nicer than I'd expected, sir." I look back to his face._ _

__He grins, his teeth now sharp and bloody. "That's what that squirrel thought too, before he tried to take a bite out of me."_ _


	2. Ghost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to only be 500 words, but you get more than that because of who I am as a person x...x

Stan and Kyle knock gingerly at the door before them, looking behind them to see Cartman laughing with Butters nervously tapping his knuckles beside him.

"I told you they'd be too chicken shit to do it, Butters." Cartman snorts.   
"Boy yo- well you sure did Eric." Butters responds sheepishly.

"Shut the fuck up Cartman!" Kyle growls.  
"Dude shut up, we're gonna do it- besides we just got up here." Stan chimes in.

They turn back to the door, noticing it cracked slightly.  
Stan looks over to Kyle, "Should we go in?" his voice cracks.  
"Y-yeah I guess so?" Kyle responds, tugging his hat over his ears, "In we go." He pushes the door open pulling his flashlight app open on his phone. 

Once inside, Kyle grabs his boyfriend's hand. "Let's check the kitchen."  
Stan gives his hand a quick squeeze, "Alright.. What are we even looking for?" Stan groans slightly.

K- "Dude, we're looking for Kenny! How did you forget already?"   
S- "Yeah but like he's dead? So what are we looking for?"  
K- "He was supposed to go with us, remember?"  
S- "You think he's still gonna want to as a ghost? It's not like he can help us EAT the candy.."  
K- "Just trust me dude.." Kyle grins, tugging his boyfriend's arm. "Besides, it's our _LAST _trick-or-treat. Let's see if he's even here first."__

__"Man I can't believe how big Bebe's boobs have gotten!" Stan yells out.  
Kyle gives him a glare, before realizing what Stan was doing. "Oh shit. Brilliant." he whispers.  
"I should definitely show these pictures to Kenny!" Stan continues._ _

__"Damn dude, those are almost as big as Henrie's!" Kyle adds._ _

__"I _know _you're not talking about my tits right now." Henrietta pops out of the shadows, irately puffing their cigarillo.___ _

____Kyle hides his face in his hands, "S..Sorry Henrie.." he pulls his hand from Stan's.  
"We're trying to call out your boyfriend.." Stan pouts._ _ _ _

____"I know, but you're both kind of.." Henrietta chuckles, "not goth enough for this.. Besides, he's not _ALL _T & A!" they squeeze at their stomach and wink.___ _ _ _

______"Now Hen, don't tell me you're jealous?" Kenny pops up behind them and wraps his arms around them, squeezing at one of their tits.  
"Kenneth, I thought you wanted to scare the little jock boys?" Henrietta responds, smacking his hand away.  
Kenny pouts playfully, "Damn.. Well, there's always fatass and Bunny." he chuckles, floating his feet up as if he were in an invisible hammock._ _ _ _ _ _

______Cut to Cartman and Butters sitting in the porch swing, cuddling for warmth.  
"H-Have you told anyone about us?" Butters asks, blushing nervously. "If my dad finds out-"  
"I know babe, and no I haven't.. but if I know Kenny he already knows.."  
Butters looks panicked, "I can't have a boyfriend Eric.. if I do.. Well.. You remember what happened with my mom and dad."  
"Shh.." Cartman stops him, placing a hand on his cheek and pulling him in for a kiss.   
Butters reciprocates, whimpering softly into the kiss._ _ _ _ _ _

______They pull apart and Cartman fixes his hair. "We should check on the dumb fucks.. They should have run out shitting their pants by now."  
Butters shivers as a cool wind begins blowing. "Ww-wwe should go in an-n-nyway."_ _ _ _ _ _

______Kenny throws a sheet over the two of them, smacking Cartman's ass when he stands up making him yelp.  
"AYE! WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?!" Cartman screeches, pulling the sheet over his head in time to see Butters hovering over him.  
"Eric! Help!" Butters cries out.  
"VERY FUNNY KAHL!" he glares over to see Kyle and Stan laughing in the doorway of the porch._ _ _ _ _ _

______"You're right, it is." Henrietta chuckles, watching Kenny cradle Butters in his arms getting ready to plop him back onto the porch._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Still feel like scaring people, Cartman?" Kenny kisses his cheek and laughs as Cartman's fist runs right through him. "I'm a ghost, dude! You can't punch me. At least wait until Henrie finds my damn body!"_ _ _ _ _ _

______"I hate you guys.. seriously.." Cartman grabs Butters' hand, "Let's get the fuck out of here Leo.."  
Butters giggles softly and follows his boyfriend. "Bye guys, good luck finding your body Ken!"_ _ _ _ _ _


	3. Witch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> INCOMING, ROWELIE ;D and Stuald :eyes:

"Guys we have a new Witch this year!" Randy drunkenly states, having begun the Jack part of their Jack and Crack Witch Week a little early.

"Randy.. Please tell me you did NOT invite your new husband.." Gerald rolls his eyes. "For fucks sake Randy you married a TOWEL!!!"

"I didn't know you felt that way Gerry." Towelie responds, adjusting his cute little witch hat he picked up earlier that morning. "I can leave if you'd prefer." he pouts.

"Did you at least bring my package?" Stuart facepalms. 

"Our best delivery Towel would never forget a package, right babe?" Randy kisses Towelie's little towel hand.

"R-Right!" Towelie pulls his hand back from Randy's grip and grabs the different packages from his delivery bag, one for each of the guys - different varieties for different needs.

"And for Mr. Tweak, Stan said that Tweek told him you guys were running low on our new CBD Honey, so I made sure to bring some with me- no extra charge."

"Thank you Mr. Marsh, it's really been helping. Tweek's grades have even gone up!" Richard takes a swig of Jack. "Is Thomas still bringing the crack?"

"Iunno." Randy shrugs, "But we brought some of the new Christmas Snow too so, worst case scenario-"

"Let's just get fucked up!" Mr. Garrison pipes up, "Before I have to go back to _running _this shit show of a country!"__

__Towelie cuddles into Randy as they light their own joint passing it back and forth, while another is passed around the rest of the crew._ _

__"Did anyone think to get firewood?" Stephen Stotch asks._ _

__"Now that I think about it, I don't see any.." Mr. Black inputs, toking the joint._ _

__"You two going to makeout in the woods again?" Stuart laughs._ _

__"Stu, I think you're getting it mixed up." Stephen chuckles, "That was you and Gerry!"_ _

__"Oh.. right." Stuart tugs at Gerald's arm, "Wanna go get some firewood?" He laughs._ _

__"What happens during Jack n Crack stays at the campsite, right?" Gerald blushes. "Fuck it, yes."_ _

__Randy and Towelie are now feeding each other s'mores and laughing at their friends as Thomas Tucker finally pulls up to the camp site._ _

__"I've got the crack!" Thomas hollers out running up to the fire, huffing because he's still too large for his own good._ _

__"We made s'mores!" Towelie responds, "You know you want one!"_ _

__"Acid?" Thomas asks. "No thanks."_ _

__"No acid, no shrooms." Towelie raises his hand in a kind of 'scout's honor' fashion._ _

__"Just regular ol' food?" Thomas asks._ _

__"Yup!" Randy licks the chocolate from his fingers._ _

__Towelie hands Thomas a s'more and offers him a bottle of Jack._ _


	4. Frankenstein's (OR Mephesto's rather) Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TEASER FOR MY BIG BAD MEPHESTO GENETICS ROWELIE FIC!!!~

Towelie made his way up the long drive to Mephesto Genetics Lab.   
Once he arrived at the gate, he was greeted by a small mute man who creepily types in a code to let them both in.

"Is Mephesto here?" he asks, digging at the hem of his side. "I need to speak with him."  
The mute man nods once, pointing with his eyes toward a room.

Towelie slowly opens the door, seeing some rather terrifying things in jars. "Dr. Mephesto, sir?"  
Mephesto grins a scary grin. "And what might the new Mr. Marsh be needing from me today? I already bought my Tegridy this week!"  
"I was hoping you might be able to help me with a thing.." Towelie sighs. "I want to be.. human."  
"Human eh? How many asses do you want?" Mephesto rubs his chin as he thinks.  
"Just one, the normal amount please." Towelie responds politely. "I.. I have money!"  
"Does your husband know that you're doing this?" Mephesto asks, raising his brow.   
Towelie stares down at his feet, "No.. I just think maybe.. people won't stare anymore. Randy would probably be happier if I weren't a towel."

Cut to Randy- Freaking out because his husband is missing. 

"Stan, have you seen your step-dad?" Randy panics slamming the door open, paying zero attention to the rest of the room.  
"No, dad. What's up?" Stan pulls the blanket over himself, hiding whoever it is he has under there from his father, who isn't paying attention enough to notice.  
"I fell asleep in the barn and when I woke up he was gone!" Randy cries out. "Where would he have gone?!" 

"I don't know, you guys _just _got married- did you fuck it up already?!" Shelly screams from her room, having heard the conversation.  
"I don't _think _I did!" Randy panics again, throwing on shoes and a jacket- once more oblivious to the fact that he was only in his underwear.____

____"Thanks for distracting him Shelly!" Stan pulls the blanket aside and Kyle catches his breath.  
"Dude.." He pants, "It's hot under your blanket."   
"Whatever, you turds owe me." She rolls her eyes._ _ _ _

____Randy hops into his truck and drives to Gerald's house, "Ger, I need your help.."  
"Jesus Randy, where are your pants?!" Sheila exclaims.  
"Huh?" Randy looks down, "Unimportant! Towelie is missing!"   
"You need pants Randy, it's snowing.." Gerald rolls his eyes, always the mom-friend.  
"I think I have some sweats in the truck." He responds, "Can you help me find him??"  
"Well, where would he have gone?" Sheila asks, concerned for her husband's friend.  
"That's just it! I have no idea.."_ _ _ _

____About an hour later he receives a call from his half-brother Jimbo. "Randy, I think.. I think we found Towelie."  
"YOU THINK?!" Randy screeches, "He's a SENTIENT TOWEL!" he fumes, "You either DID or you DIDN'T!"  
"Well.. we found _someone _outside of Mephesto Genetics Lab." Jimbo rolls his eyes.___ _ _ _

______"Mephest-" Randy fades as Ned pulls up with a passenger that _isn't _Jimbo.  
"Towelie?" Randy worries..___ _ _ _ _ _

________"Mmmnn He was naked in the snow, he needs medical attentionnnmmm." Ned responds, noting that the man with the long periwinkle hair is completely knocked out._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"I.. Why would he-" Randy stares at the man, sobbing softly.. "I don't understand?"  
Gerald and Stuart help Randy carry the naked man into the house, placing him near the fireplace and tossing a few blankets over him. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"What do I even say to him, if that really _is _him?" Randy shakes his head, trying to comprehend the situation.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	5. Mummy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So for this I'm thinking they're all about 16-17 like.. old enough to at least somewhat know/explore their sexualities but young enough to still pull pranks and possibly be near the end of their trick or treat years?
> 
> Another of those "supposed to be 100-500 words" but turned into 1500+words.. XD
> 
> I get too many ideas and they all end up running together, so I'm sorry if this is a little all over the place lmao

"What are you boys doing with all of this toilet paper?" The cashier asks, "Going to mummify a house?" he laughs.  
"Nah, just some really fat kid." Craig replies, sticking his middle finger up.

Craig and his band of misfit characters (they couldn't agree on a theme) head over to Cartman's house.  
"Why are w-we helping h-h-him again?" Jimmy struggles to ask, shivering in his "Sexy Maid" costume. (The cold makes his stutter worse, and of course he had to go with a "sexy" costume, bc Jimmy.)  
"Well, technically it's not helping.. if he doesn't _know _what he's going as." Token responds, scratching at his elbow- the scabs from Cartman's last stunt still healing, getting hung on the sweater of his Space Warrior costume.  
"Gah! I still think this is a bad idea.. hnng.." Tweek clings to Craig, the Imp and the Youth Pastor - so typical.  
"Calm down honey." Craig deadpans, wrapping his arm around his waist.   
"We're just gonna wrap some toilet paper around him, make him look like a giant piece of shit (because that's what he is), and tell him he's a mummy. What could go wrong? Besides, it was Clyde's idea."__

__"Is that why you brought me along?" Raisins Girl Bebe giggles, clinging to her boyfriend's arm. "Makeup? Great idea babe!"  
Mosquito Clyde smirks, "Of course it is Bebe! My ideas are always great."  
Craig begins with, "You mean like the time we all went sledding and-"   
"WE DON'T SPEAK OF THAT TIME" Clyde interrupts.  
"Yeah, that's what I thought." Token chuckles._ _

__"Hnnng, Tell me why we still listen to him?" Tweek twitches, tugging at his shirt.  
Craig fixes his shirt, "Because despite some of the lamer of his ideas, this one is _actually _funny." He smirks.  
"Ey!" Cartman yells out his window. "None of that queer-mo shit on my property!" ___ _

____"Do you want our help or not, Fatass?!" Tweek growls.  
Craig blushes, drinking in the beautifully annoyed face of his love.   
Token and Bebe slip between them, each grabbing one of the boys' hands. "Come on lovebirds. Jeez!"_ _ _ _

____Once inside Clyde, Token, and Bebe calculate the amount of TP they'll need while Craig and Tweek measure Cartman's height and width.  
"I still don't understand why it took all FIVE of you.." Cartman huffs, the weight issue becoming more obvious. "Also, where's Kyle?"  
"He didn't need our help, so he said he'd be running a little late. Sorry we forgot to tell you.." Clyde responds.  
"He could have helped ME deal with YOU assholes though." Cartman grumbles.   
"We're the assholes?!" Craig responds sarcastically, dropping his measuring tape, acting offended. "I mean come on!"_ _ _ _

____"EY!!" Cartman bumps his funny bone on the desk beside him as he drops his arms to his sides; "That fuckin' tickled!" he grabs his elbow, whining at the nerves shooting pain up his arm.  
"Aww someone's ticklish?" Butters giggles, sipping his boba tea as he leans against the doorframe.   
"Where's your fuckin' boyfriend?" Cartman growls.   
"Eric.." Kyle sighs. "I'm literally right here." He pushes a curl out of his face.   
"Okay, so.. What exactly are we doing?" he rolls his eyes at the display before him, the Imp kneeling trying to get leg measurements, the Youth Pastor trying to get arm measurements. "This isn't Home Economics guys.. it's literally unrolling toilet paper onto a body.. You don't need measurements."_ _ _ _

____"But.. Mr. Garrison said.." Butters interrupts, "We have to log all measurements or it doesn't count towards our extra credit!"  
"I don't think this costume counts.." Kyle frowns, knowing that his poor butterfingered boyfriend is not doing very well in this class.  
"I just.. need three more costumes.." Butters whimpers._ _ _ _

____"You can count mine!" Tweek pipes up, "I mean.. you did help with the tail after all.."  
"Me too!" Bebe reminds him, "I couldn't have gotten Portia's wing sauce stains out of this Raisin's shirt without your help!"   
"And you _did _make my cape.." Kyle blushes.___ _ _ _

______"I didn't know Vampires could blush." Cartman laughs.  
"Oh shut it, Fatso!" Kyle hides his face.  
"Can we get started on my costume before all of the candy is gone??" Cartman rolls his eyes.  
"Sure babe." Butters pecks his cheek._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Babe?" Craig and Tweek steal glances.  
"Oops.." Butters blushes, gripping at his skinny jeans.   
"God damn it Butters.." Cartman blushes._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Wait.. What??" Token looks over at the trio, "You three are..?"  
"Yes, okay?!" Cartman rolls his eyes. "I'm just.. not out yet.. okay??? Can we like.. Ignore this?"  
"Of course.." Token looks over to Clyde and Bebe, who nod knowingly. _ _ _ _ _ _

______"Would it be easier if Cartman spun around or if we rolled it around him?" Craig asks Tweek, who seems to be taking the new information relatively unaffectedly.  
"I think he would get dizzy if we made him spin, and then he'd be too sick to trick-or-treat." Tweek responds, tugging on Craig's sleeve. "Let's uhh.. Wrap er- Mummify him rather."_ _ _ _ _ _

______"Hold on!" Clyde tugs Craig's other sleeve. "I need to ask you something.."  
Craig follows Clyde to the hallway, "What is it, dude?"  
"We can't." Clyde looks to the floor.  
"What?! It was _your _idea.." Craig rolls his eyes.  
Clyde semi-panics, "But he-"   
"-Was just outed, I know.. I think Tweek would probably disapprove at this point too.." Craig tucks his hands in his pockets. "Let's go back in."___ _ _ _ _ _

________"Okay so Tweek-" Craig looks up to see that Tweek and Bebe had already begun with some scary mummy FX makeup.  
"Never mind, it looks like you figured it out." He chuckles._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Kyle and Butters help Clyde and Craig with the wrapping to get it finished faster. "I still don't understand why you wouldn't just be a vampire like me and Kyle.." Butters boops his nose, "But I guess you're just too stubborn, and I thought Kyle was the stubborn one."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Stan and Kenny hobble drunkenly into the room, "Ughhh.." Kenny zombie walks his way to the bed. "Braiiins.."  
"You can't fool us Kenny.." Tweek laughs as he misses the bed. "How much did you guys drink?!"   
"I mean.." Stan pulls the empty butterscotch vodka bottle from his inner coat pocket. "It was about half full?"  
"Jesus dude.. You really need to kick that habit.." Kyle grabs the bottle and tosses it into the recycling. "Good thing Ms. Cartman keeps the cans literally right under your window."  
"Mrrrph.." Kenny responds, pulling his hood down. "I feel like I'm gonna puke.."  
"Gross Dude!" Stan laughs.   
"You're one to talk, how many times did you puke on Wendy when we were younger?" Kyle laughs._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Cartman finally finishes his costume's "final touches". "What do you guys think??"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"What a hottie!" Bebe laughs.  
"Quit trying to steal my girl!" Clyde joins the laughter.  
"What? What's so funny??" Cartman turns to look in the mirror._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"O-OOPS! I MEANT TO R-REMOVE THAT!" Jimmy laughs, "IT WAS JUST A J-J-JOKE DUDE I SWEAR!"  
"Ugh.. I knew I shouldn't have trusted you.." He rolls his eyes, "Just remove it please."  
"Alright alright, I'll c-c-castrate ya." Jimmy chuckles once more.  
"Ugh.." Cartman gives a grin, "I have to admit though, it would have been funny if it weren't me.."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Kyle and Butters exchange a look._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Shall we get to the candy??!" Cartman's eyes sparkle. "Oh and uhh.. Thank you all for helping me.. I guess.." He blushes, looking over to his two boyfriends.. envious of their boldness. How can they be so brave. Both of them came out relatively easily.. Though, Kyle is pan and Butters is bi.. Neither of them are just.. Gay. He thinks to himself for a while, as they all stroll together out of the house._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Eric!" Butters tugs his arm, "Your mom wanted to ask you something- We'll wait here."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Kyle grabs Butters' hand and smiles. "So, how'd it go?"  
"She's gonna ask him I think.. But I hope he doesn't suspect us.."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Eric, are Kenny and Stan staying the night?" She taps her foot lightly.  
"I was going to ask mom, I swear.." Cartman puts his large puppy eyes to good use.  
"You're not in trouble, but they will be if their parents think I contributed any of this alcohol!"  
"Mom, they know better.. Besides, if they spend the night no one needs to know they got drunk, right?" He taps his foot against hers._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"You're such a little rascal." Liane responds.  
"Can I go trick or treats with my friends now?" Cartman asks.   
"One more question Eric." Liane states.  
"Okay, what is it mom?"   
"Eric, are you.. gay?" She begins, still unsure if she should even meddle.  
"Yes." He responds rather quickly. "Yes mom, I'm gay." He sobs softly.   
"Don't cry baby! No!" Liane hugs her son, petting his back.  
"D-Did they tell you to ask me?" he whimpers, hugging her back, tears and makeup staining her witch costume.  
"Who poopie-kins?"   
"M-my.. uhh.. boyfriends.. Kyle and Butters.."   
"You have two? At least they're both sweet boys."  
"Mhmm.."  
"You realize it's living room nights from now on though.."  
"Y-Yes mom.. Can I go trick or treats now?" He sniffles.  
"Sure thing hon." She pats his back gently and stands, fixing her hat and wiping the makeup from her dress._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________"Kyle! Butters!" Cartman yells to them, running out the door. "I-I'm.. OUT!"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Kyle and Butters both run to their boyfriend and each pepper him with kisses and laughter._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Craig and his gang had already left, Kyle's idea- their head start would leave the trio with plenty of alone time._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	6. Zombie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I mean... It's Kenny? XD

Kenny McCormick has always died.. Kenny McCormick has always come back..

But maybe not _quite _like _THIS _!____

____It was the end of summer, or what South Park liked to _call _summer anyway.  
We had all been fuckin' around outside just killing time until our parents called or the streetlights came on.   
Kenny just froze in his tracks. We all watched as his body went cold and slammed into the pavement.___ _ _ _

______We called for an adult and no one came, so we lugged him to my mom in the wagon._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Mom! MOM!! We need help! Kenny's not breathing!!" I cried, tears streaming down my face as they always did.  
I was the only one who ever remembered (or so I had thought). "MOM!!?"  
"What is it poopie-kins?" I heard her say from her bedroom window.  
"Mom! We need an ambulance! Kenny fell and there's a big scar on his face.. I don't think he's breathing!" I yelled up to her, pulling the wagon inside with help from my friends.  
"Ohhh-Okay Sweetie! The phone is in the kitchen, just dial 911 and let the nice telephone people help you!" She responded, closing her window and locking her door. She always had visitors in her room._ _ _ _ _ _

______"Dude, I don't think he's gonna make it.." Stan said, trying to hold back vomit as Kyle rubbed his back.  
"Don't talk like that dude, he's just _gotta _pull through! It's Kenny.." Kyle responded.___ _ _ _ _ _

________I put Kenny in front of the heater before dragging one of the dining room chairs over to the house phone, as it was just barely out of reach.  
I carefully assessed whether the chair could withstand my weight before climbing on top and reaching towards the receiver.  
I put the phone to my ear and made sure I could hear a dial tone before punching the buttons, nine, then one, then one again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________I held my breath as I waited for someone to pick up on the other line.  
The lady on the other end answered with a perky "9-1-1, what is your emergency today?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Before I knew it the lady had all of the information and had sent an ambulance.  
She wanted me to stay on the line until they arrived, but I explained to her that I needed to go back and check on my friend._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________When the ambulance arrived I already knew it was too late, but they still attempted CPR and the shock-pad things..  
I thought I saw his little arm move in the open-casket funeral..  
I should have listened to my gut about that.. Or else we wouldn't be running for our fucking lives right now _FROM HIM. _____ _ _ _ _ _


	7. Spider

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Henrietta x Happiness? Yes pls.
> 
> Henrie x Butters x Kenny = adorableness I didn't realize I needed lmao
> 
> Henrietta deserves happy damn it, and if that means adding BUNNY I'mma got damn do it.
> 
> Idk where the fuck I was going with this, but Henrie is a spider king now. lmfao.

Henrietta Biggle and Kenneth McCormick had a history of flirtation, but on occasion she just WAS NOT in the mood, and because of who he was as a person he just never got the hint..

"Hey Henrie! Aren't you lookin' hot as ever!~" Kenny whistled, eyeing them up and down.  
"Shut it McCormick!" Henrietta shouted back, slamming their locker shut and displaying the smudged makeup streaking down their face.  
"Oh shit babe, are you okay?!" Kenny rushed to their side, pulling a small minionized packet of tissues from his inner pocket.  
"Kenny, seriously.. Not today." Henrietta pushed the tissues away, reaching for the silk handkerchief in their corset. "Seriously dude."  
"Wanna talk about it?" He pleaded, noticing his boyfriend trying to be sly about sneaking up on them- he drug a finger across his neck as if to say 'not today' but Leo was never good at taking hints.  
"What are ya doin' over here all alone _babe _?" Butters slips a hand onto Henrietta's hip and smiles. "Your makeup looks so pretty, like spider webs.."  
"Are you just _DYING _to be bitten little FLY?!" They growl, ripping Butters' hand from their hip.  
"I tried.." Kenny whines. "I'm sorry Henrie, we'll leave you be.. if you feel like talking about it you've got my number okay?" Kenny blows them a kiss and grabs Butters' hand, walking to class with him.____

____"You okay Bunny?" Kenny kisses his hand once their far from view of Henrietta. "I know they can be a little rough sometimes.."  
"I'm fine, is Henrie okay? These mood swings have gotten a bit worse and I'm worried about them.." Butters looks to the ground, "I know they say they don't need medication, but.."  
"Henrie is brave for going without meds as long as they have, especially considering all they've been through- but I have to agree Leo, I'm worried too." Kenny kisses his cheek, "We'll talk once they're ready to talk- okay?"_ _ _ _

____Henrietta slams their locker shut and crawls into the only non-gender specific bathroom the school has, locking the door behind them.  
"Fuck everything!" they scream to themself into the void as they forgot to even flip the light switch.  
They struggle in the dark but eventually find the switch. No one has bothered to clean this place in years apparently.  
The ceiling is matted with cobwebs, not that they mind _those _so much.___ _ _ _

______They pull out a compact, wiping off the stupid tears caused by yet another _stupid _female, they didn't always have to be so RUDE about not liking trans 'weirdos'.  
"Maybe I should just take dumb and dumber up on their offer.." They think to themself. "Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.. it's not like they aren't cute.. just.. kinda.. _perky _for my taste."_____ _ _ _ _ _

__________A spider drops to their shoulder, crawling up down their arm to their fingers. "Hello friend.." they place the little spider gently onto the floor and watch as it crawls up the wall.  
"I should look you up when I get home." They think aloud. "Guess I should actually _go _home."___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________They peek out the door and take small sheepish steps out into the hallway.  
Kenny pops up next to them, "Hey Henrie, need a ride home babe?"  
"Honestly.. I'd like that.." They state, pulling at his parka strings. "Will your beat up truck carry my fat ass?"  
"If it doesn't, I'll piggyback you." Kenny laughs, fixing his hood.  
"I'll hold you to that, you'd better have a strong back!" They tease, kissing his cheek.  
"If he can't do it, I'm sure I can!" Leo grins, walking up from behind and planting a kiss on Henrietta's cheek.  
Henrietta chuckles softly, planting a kiss on Leo's cheek. "Ya know, you're pretty cute for a JT." They roll their eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________"Creativity and independence." Henrietta states, flipping the card in their hand, allowing the dragons blood smoke to fill their nostrils as they meditate.  
They close their eyes and allow images of their spider friend to flow into their sight, the way the little spider would weave it's web. "I kinda want one.."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Henrie woke to find that their incense had died out, the card still in their hand. "Maybe I should?" they think._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Text from Henrie <3:  
"So, Kenneth.. How serious are you and your boy toy about perusing me?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________New Text from The Orange One <3:  
"Are you serious Henrie?! We've only been trying for over a year.."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________New Text from Butter-Flyy <3:  
"You two always act like this isn't a group chat.. -rolling eyes emoji-"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________New Text from Henrie <3:  
"What if I were to give you guys a chance?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________They sigh, covering their face with their pillow- were they really going through with this?.._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________New Text from The Orange One <3:  
"You already know how I feel Babe..-pleading face emoji-"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________New Text from Butter-Flyy <3:  
"When and Where Babe?? -two hearts emoji-"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________New Text from Henrie <3:  
"This is very off topic and very _NOT _sexual, but.. do you have any rope??"___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________New Text from The Orange One <3:  
"UHHHHH... I mean I have rope.. It's new/clean.. What do you need it for??"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________New Text from Henrie <3:  
"Long story short, I want to build something."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________New Text from The Orange One <3:  
"I'll bring it with tomorrow. -insert kiss emoji- Goodnight Henrie & Goodnight bunny!"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________New Text from Butter-Flyy <3:  
"Goodnight Ken & Goodnight Henrie -insert two kiss emojis-"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________New Text From Henrie <3:  
"Goodnight -insert spider and heart emoji-"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________"Ugh.. I can already tell this is a bad idea, but I really need to build a web.. I'm hyper-fixating and I won't be able to rest until I have one.." they think to themself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The next day Kenny and Butters pick Henrie up for school, they don't even care that Firkle happened to see them kiss.  
"I brought the rope you requested." Kenny smirks, "What's it for?"  
"You'd just laugh.." Henrietta blushes, grasping their knees.  
"Of course we won't!" Butters states, rather loudly.. a little too close to Henrie's ear.  
"If you say so.." Henrie exhales rather loudly, "I want to build my own web.. like a spider web?" They flick the card onto the dashboard rather harshly.  
"You want to build a web, like in your room?" Kenny raises an eyebrow. "To keep people out? Or.. In?"  
"Neither, I just really like them.." They look up into his knowing eyes, unsure what to think when he just nods.  
"I get it. I've got a pet opossum, his name is Mr. Possey." Kenny grins, patting Henrie's thigh.  
"I have some uhh.. Gerbils.." Butters knocks his knuckles together, "They're real cute, but they don't really respond to commands like Mr. Possey."  
Henrie chuckles. "Wanna watch me weave my web, little fly?" they walk their fingers up Leo's arm.  
Butters blushes, slipping his hand around Henrie's waist, fiddling with the steel bones of their corset as he passes over them. "Maybe.."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________They pull up to the school, not bothering to grab for their bags, class doesn't actually start for another hour anyway.  
Henrie lights up their cigarette, puffing at it and inhaling deeply. "Mom stole my fucking thermos again."  
They shake the ash from their hand when it falls. "So this is my morning coffee, don't start fucking with me about smoking right now."  
"Oh.. I'm sorry to hear that Henrie.." Butters taps his foot, pulling his wig from the back of Kenny's truck. "Ken, will you help me brush it today?"  
"Of course, feeling more Marjorine today Bunny?" Kenny rubs the tip of his nose onto Leo's causing the slightly more buff of the two to giggle.  
"I am.." Marjorine blushes. "Is- uhh.. Is that okay with you?" She turns to Henrie.  
"Why wouldn't it be?!" Henrie looks almost offended at the question. "I-"  
"We just haven't really set boundaries and my dad doesn't ah.. Doesn't know about m..me yet." She blushes, hiding underneath her wig.  
Henrie pulls the wig from Marjorine's face. "If you'd like, I can help you with your wig."  
She blushes letting go of the wig and nods, "Um.. P-Please.." She sniffles.  
Henrie sheepishly moves in for a quick peck and smiles when Marjorine doesn't back away from it. "I would be honored."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________When they finally strolled into homeroom, Mr. Garrison commented on how nice Marjorine's hair looked today.  
The one adult they knew would not only help keep Butters' secret from his dad, but would actually beat any other adult who tried to mention it in front of him.   
"Thanks Mr. Garrison!" Marj responded with a grin, "Henrie helped me with it today!"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Once school was out, Kenny and Marjorine waited patiently at his truck while Henrietta talked for half an hour with Pete and Michael about their plans and why they wouldn't be hanging out at their house tonight._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________"Anyway, I gotta go- Thanks for listening.." Henrietta looked to ground then back up as Pete and Michael pulled them into a hug.  
"You totally gotta send pics when you're done with it.." Pete puffed his cigarette before tossing the butt to the ground and stomping it into the snow.  
Michael then picks it up and places it in the canister he keeps with him, "Dude, no way! No littering.. Yeah Henrie send us pics! See you tomorrow?"  
Henrietta nods and practically runs to Kenny's truck._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________They slam him against the truck with a hungry kiss.  
When Marjorine blushes and taps Henrie's shoulder, they move over to her with the same hunger.  
Kenny catches his breath and laughs. "Damn babe, what is this?"  
When Henrietta detaches themself from Marjorine to breathe, they giggle. "Sorry, I've just been aching to kiss you two like.. all day.." they blush._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The three of them hop into Kenny's truck, Marjorine begins removing bobby pins. "I'd leave it on, but.. your house is too close to mine." Butters frowns.  
"If you'd like, I can help you style your natural hair in a femme way?" Henrietta smiles, helping with the wig.   
"That would be awesome!" Kenny grins._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________When they all hop out of Kenny's truck, Henrietta's mother walks out of the house concerned.  
"Hey mom." Henrie rolls her eyes, "these are my uh-"  
"Hello Ms. Biggle!" Butters shines a smile no one could say no to, "How's Bradley?"_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________She lets them in the front door and even promises to bring up some black and white cookies._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________"How the FUCK did you do that??" Henrie laughs, "Even Pete, Michael, and _Firkle _have to sneak in!"  
"Charming, isn't she?" Kenny chuckles, caressing Marjorine's jawline and bringing her in for a kiss.  
"Very.." Henrie blushes. "So I gathered some information on different knots we can use for the web.  
Marjorine curls up on Henrie's bed, resting her head on their lap as they talk.  
Henrie plays with her hair as they continue going over the plans with Kenny, before they know it Marjorine is snoring.  
"Poor Bunny.. She had a long day.." Kenny frowns.  
"What happened?" Henrie looks down at the sleeping teen on their lap, "Poor baby.."  
"We'll talk about it later. What knots are we using?" Kenny pulls the rope from his backpack.  
"I was looking at some different designs.. Mom recommended using 'pinterest' so.."  
"Ugh, Marjie's mom uses that site." Kenny rolls his eyes, "They'll look at projects forever and never actually _DO _any of them!"  
"Yeah, mine does too. I actually found some decent ideas though. I was thinking I could either do one draped over my bed, like a curtain, or a spiral one on the ceiling!"  
Kenny stands up eyeing the room, "You know.. We wouldn't have to knot it if we made it like a dream catcher!"  
"How would that even work??" Henrie replaces their lap with a pillow for Marjorine's head as they stand, their eyes glittering at the thought.  
"Have you got any cup hooks?" Kenny eyes the room. "I could bring those and more rope tomorrow if we don't have enough!"  
"I think I do! I have a junk drawer, hold on!" They grin, eyes sparkling as they pull out the bottom left drawer of their dresser.  
After a few moments of carefully searching, they come up with a mug full of hooks. "Found them!"_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________Henrietta's mother knocks on the door, "Oh Henrietta!~ I brought cookies!~" she sing-songs as she enters the room.  
"My it's so dark in here, I do wish you'd add some brighter colors!" She hums to herself, setting the cookies on the bedside table.   
"Jesus mom, you'd think by now you would _GET _that I don't _do _bright colors." Henrie glares.  
"Thanks for the cookies Mrs. B!" Kenny smiles, looking over to the peacefully sleeping Marjorine. "I'm sure Bunny would thank you too, but.."  
"What a little angel." Mrs. Biggle pulls a blanket over Marj and smiles.   
"Yeahhh.. Can you like.. Leave now?" Henrietta rolls their eyes.   
"Alright sweetie, I'll be downstairs if you need me!~" She smiles, closing the door behind her.  
"Thank fucking god she finally left." Henrie huffs, "Let's get this thing started!"_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________They hang the hooks about three feet apart, one foot between them in the corners.  
Marjorine awakens to the two of them falling onto the bed when they've finished.  
"Wha-" She wipes her eyes.  
"Well good morning sleepyhead~" Kenny kisses her cheek. "There are cookies."  
"Hm.. Cookies.." She lazily looks to the bedside as Henrie hands her a cookie.  
"Wakey wakey.." They tease, tapping the cookie on her nose.  
Marjorine groans, gripping the side of her head. "Mmm.. Thanks.."  
"Do you need water baby?" Henrietta asks, worried.  
"Y-Yes please.." She mumbles.  
"Ibuprofen?" Kenny grabs the bottle from his backpack.  
"Mhmm.." She sniffles.  
Henrie gives Kenny a look, then heads for the kitchen for water._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________"Bunny, do you wanna talk about it?" Kenny pets her head, pulling her into his chest.  
"Mm-Mm.." she shakes her head. "Cuddle me?" she wraps her arms around him.  
"Okay, but.." Kenny begins, "When Henrie gets back with your water, you need to take this." He shakes the bottle of pills and sets it on the bedside table, pulling her into his arms, laying back onto Henrietta's bed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________"I talked my mom into giving my thermos back!" Henrie shouts, "It's ice water."  
They hand it to Kenny, who helps Marjorine sit up.  
Henrie feels her head, "no fever." they hum.  
"No.. just pain.." Butters groans, wiping his lipgloss off before swallowing the pills.  
"Maybe you should go back to sleep.." Kenny suggests, "Henrie?"  
"You can use my bed." Henrietta smiles, "I've got the pull out couch anyway."  
"It's plenty big enough for the three of us." Kenny pouts.  
Butters sips slowly on the ice water, "I-I'd like.." he blushes. "Can we cuddle?"  
"You wanna tell me about that bruise first?" Henrie asks.  
"Oh.." He frowns. "Some asshole hit me."   
"Who?!" Henrietta growls.  
"I don't know his name."  
"Tenorman." Kenny scowls. "Scott Tenorman. He's had a vendetta against my friend-group since we were ten. He sees my Bunny being trans as a 'reason' to pick on him."  
Kenny pulls Butters closer to him, peppering kisses on his face.   
"So we need to scare him?" Henrie grins evilly, "and I think I have the perfect way. Let's finish this web."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________The next day:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________________"We'll need silly string, more rope, and a TON of RC spiders." Henrie grins.  
"How are you going to get him in the room?" Butters asks inquisitively.  
"They're not going to make it to the room, but.." They give a sly look. "I was going to eh.. ' _seduce _' him."  
"Are you sure you want to do that?" Kenny scratches his chin, "I mean.. I get it kinda? but.."  
"It's just for a night, right?" Henrietta clasps his hands into theirs. "I'm not actually interested in this kid, okay?"   
"I know babe." Kenny chuckles.   
"Don't you need a uh- Costume?" Butters asks.  
Henrietta bursts into laughter, "You think your goth 'spider king' theyfriend doesn't have the right clothes for this?"  
"I meant for us, babe." Butters giggles, sticking his tongue out at them.  
"All you boys need is full black. I've got that, and if I didn't Pete and Michael do!"___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________They finish shopping, Kenny drops Henrie off at their house._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________Pete, Michael, and Firkle show up.  
"What the hell did you text us? It's incomprehensible!" Michael raises an eyebrow, climbing through the window.  
"Fucking AWESOME web, my goth spider king!" Firkle's eyes sparkle as he eyes the web.  
Pete flips his hair, "What's this about a plan to scare someone?" _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________________"I need you guys to help me." Henrie puffs their cigarette. "Someone hit one of my significant others."  
"So you're going to _scare _them?" Firkle asks, "Why not just like... kill them? Or send them off to Scottsdale?"  
"He's already eaten his parents, I doubt much else will traumatize him." Michael states with an eye roll.  
"I've been informed that he is absolutely terrified of spiders. Can I borrow your tarantulas?"   
"Totally, as long as they don't get hurt.. Pinky and the Brain are my life." Firkle states flatly.   
"Of course not Firk."   
"Here's the plan." ___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________The next day:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Unknown Number:  
Hello ginger-snap~ You're such a cutie._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Soulless Ginger:  
Who is this?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Unknown Number:  
Your secret admirer. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Soulless Ginger:  
Fuck off twerp, I know it's you again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Unknown Number:  
That almost hurts my feelings, but I didn't get all dolled up to be told no._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Soulless Ginger:  
If you're not the fatass, prove it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________________New text from Unknown Number:  
Turn around handsome._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________________________"What?" Scott looks up from his phone and turns around to see about 23 RC spiders heading toward him. "The fuck?"  
He turns to run only to be sprayed from head to toe with silly string.  
"Awe, what's wrong cutie, I thought you wanted to play?" Henrietta giggles, "Now!"  
Pete and Michael wrap him with rope, tying him down.  
"Mister, I wasn't kidding. I admire you all right." Henrie pouts playfully, stepping just short of his genitalia.   
"What the fuck do you want from me? What have I ever done to you?!" Tenorman sobs angrily.   
"Bunny boy, come to mama." Henrie waves their finger at Butters, pulling his head onto their extra perky chest once he walks over.  
Pinky and the Brain creep down Henriettas arms, finding comfort on their forearms as they hold Butters.  
"You're going to be _NICE _to MY significant other, or else." Henrie's foot slides closer to Scott's genitals. "You're going to lose these bits." They step gently onto the flesh beneath their boot."  
Scott wimpers, tears falling from his face. "I'll leave her alone.. What's with all the spiders?!"  
Michael grins, dropping the jar of collected spiders near his head. "Sorry Hen, I couldn't find any fake ones."  
The spiders crawl on the teenager, covering his neck and head. "I SAID I'D LEAVE HER ALONE, WHY ARE YOU STILL TORTURING ME?!"  
"Well, you see- We have to make sure you're true to your word." Firkle states flatly, pulling his switchblade from his back pocket and dragging it softly along his neck. "We don't _trust _you."  
"What are you doing with that knife?" He shivers, the spiders having decided to crawl into his shirt and down his pants.  
"Nothing... yet." Firkle puts the knife away. "Can we send this stupid fuck to Scottsdale?"  
"I mean, why not?" Pete ashes his cigarette, deciding not to put it out on Scott's temple.  
Henrietta pets Butters' head, allowing Pinky and the Brain to settle into their chest as well. "Sounds good to me, What do you think baby?"  
Butters nods, disturbing the tarantulas slightly.   
Firkle brings over the portable terrariums and collects them.   
Kenny kicks Tenorman in the ribs. "That's for everything, consider yourself lucky. Also: Fuck you."_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	8. Vampire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyle shooting down the "top dog" vampire of the school? Sure why not. XD

(Sooo, think like: Renaissance Gothic Vampire/Wizard Attire)

Kyle Broflovski had the most realistic looking vampire attire. He even shielded himself from the sun. His skin was paler than ever, his teeth were naturally sharp, hell even his freckles (few as they were) seemed to disappear. He was gorgeous.

"I have to meet him.." Mike was saying to his now acquaintance Pete. "He's so dreamy.." his eyes were lost in the pendant on Kyle's throat.  
"Oh brother.." Pete rolls his eyes, flipping his hair out of his face. "Why the fuck do I even talk to you?"   
"Because somewhere along the way, we stopped being enemies." Mike chuckles. "Besides- you have to admit, I'm not all that bad am I?"  
"If you'd shut up about ol' Ginger Snaps over there." Pete flicks his ashes and takes a deep drawl of his cigarette, exhaling the smoke away from Mike. "You might be tolerable."  
"Fine. I'll just have to talk to him so that he can reject me and I can quit daydreaming. Simple, right?" Mike shoos the smoke away from the table. "You really should quit that nasty habit, it's bad for you." He stands and walks toward the redhead in question.  
"Good luck, count dorkula." Pete flips his hair from his face and puts out his cigarette.

"You can do this. You are Vampyr. You are brave." Mike thinks to himself as he slowly approaches the tall, slender, red haired man.  
Kyle notices him walking toward him. "To what do I owe the pleasure, Mike?" Kyle asks, raising an eyebrow- unamusedly.  
"Hi, uh.. Hello.. I-" Mike stumbles over his words, biting his tongue, he tastes copper and whimpers. "I was.. going to ask."  
"Your blood stinks. It appalls me. Leave, please." Kyle taps the crystal ball on the end of his walking cane, and as if hypnotized- Mike turns and walks back to Pete.

"So how'd it go?" Pete asks sarcastically.   
"I-"  
"Oh you're bleeding." Pete grins, "Or is it not _your _blood?"  
"No- idsh minde" Mike struggles to say, "I bint mah tonnngue"  
"Okay okay, I get it- STOP TALKING." Pete rolls his eyes. "Let's take you to the nurse.."__


	9. Organs/Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pip? Pip.
> 
> Idk it turned into things.. :gaypanictowelie:

I blinked, then the giant robot hit me. 

I remember seeing my blood spew, as she had severed an artery.  
I remember watching as my guts spewed from my body.  
My intestines had wrapped around her arm.  
I was almost completely torn in half by the time I hit the ground.

The pain was unbearable at first, but the shock set in and I didn't feel a thing.  
The last thing I remember seeing before I passed was.. Kenneth McCormick.. He.. had wings?  
I'm still not sure how I ended up _here _but, the only real friend I've ever had lives here.. So I suppose it can't be too bad?__

__Damien Thorn, the cutest boy I ever met.. I could never tell him what I really felt. Never._ _

__But- apparently _HE _can. He read my mind the first few moments of our meeting here in Hell.  
Apparently there is no concept of time here, and somehow I've grown by at least seventeen years already..  
My body, or whatever this thing is.. has been sewn back together hastily.. I feel like a ragdoll.  
The scars healed too quickly, and left me with deformity all over.. I feel.. ugly.___ _

____"Phillip, why so glum darling?" He whispered, his breath filled with the sulfur of hellflames.  
"Why am I _here _?" Pip asks, looking up to see a softness in the eyes of the son of Satan.  
Damien places his hand over Pip's, "I didn't figure you'd prefer your fake friends to me, but if I was wrong-"  
"No! I.. I just didn't know I'd done enough bad to.. end up here." Pip blushes, knowing his friend would probably disapprove of these words.  
Damien just chuckles. "You didn't, but sometimes.. I get to use my influence."  
"You wanted me here?" Pip asks, "No one.. _wants _me.." he begins to sob.  
"Of course I want you.." Damien wipes the tears from Pip's face, swiping the hair from his face and pulling his chin up._____ _ _ _

________"Damien-" He's interrupted by lips on his own, his eyes close as he reciprocates with a hunger he hadn't realize had risen in him.  
When the kiss is broken, Damien wipes another tear away. "I want you to rule with me.."  
"What.. does that mean.. exactly?" Pip brings a hand to his lips, the heat from their kiss consuming him.  
Damien, the palest man Pip had ever seen, blushed- a thing he wasn't entirely certain he had seen. "The kiss didn't explain what I meant?"  
"But I'm so hideous.. Look at the scars!" Pip cries out, pulling the sleeves up on his over-sized shirt, borrowed from Satan himself.  
Damien pulls a ruby encrusted crown from a drawer, "I guess I had this made for no one? Please Phillip.."  
Pip pulls the sleeves back down, deciding that his self-loathing tantrum had ended. "You.."_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________"I didn't know when you'd die, but you were mortal.. I knew it was a matter of time." Damien places the crown atop Pip's head. "Perfect fit.."  
"You wanted me.. before I died?" Pips eyes widened.  
"Phillip, you showed me kindness.. All those years ago.. Even knowing I was the son of Satan."  
Damien grinned as Pip leaned his body into him. "Of course I did.. You needed _someone _on your side."  
"Stay by my side? For eternity? Marry me?" Damien asks, the severity of the question coursing through his veins- the flame in his eyes growing hotter. "Please?"  
"Of course, Damien." Pip embraces his now fiance, kissing him with passion as the flames of Hell begin burning a few degrees hotter, a beautiful ring appearing on his finger.___ _ _ _ _


End file.
